You’re a mom and you feel stressed out, overwhelmed, and stuck in feeling the toxic guilt of parenting “wrong.” You worry that you don’t “measure up” to other moms—you know, the ones who seem to have it all together? You even feel a little guilty for either giving in to your child or even yelling. You always pictured yourself enjoying motherhood, but lately, you definitely aren't enjoying it. You want to be the best mom you can and enjoy your kids more, but are confused and overwhelmed about how to do that.
Can you relate to any of these problems?
* Susan was doubting herself as a mother when we first met. She often snapped at her kids, which made her feel horrible. She was running from crisis to crisis. Sometimes it was the kids arguing with her. Other times, it was their bickering with one another. Overall, she felt stressed and alone, and wondered why the picture she had in her head didn't match her reality. She was also embarrassed to admit to anyone that she was struggling as a mother. After working with me, she discovered how to adjust her expectations of herself and her kids, and began to see herself as an effective mom! She learned new tools that helped her to stay connected to her kids and still set limits. Most importantly, she had the peace of mind that she was being the kind of mom she always wanted: one that was more relaxed and enjoyed parenting.
* Anne came to me for help with her preschooler's tantrums. She also knew that her reaction was a big part of the problem. When her son "melted down," and began to scream and cry, Anne reacted by yelling back at him. What started as her son's tantrum quickly became a power struggle between the two of them. She knew in her heart that he was only three and needed help managing his feelings. Yet, she discovered that SHE needed help managing HER feelings first. We worked together to help her do this. After working with me she also saw that she was a better mom than she realized. By focusing on her strengths, she began to feel better, which enabled her to better help her son manage his feelings. She neded coaching feeling confident and competent.
* Jennifer called me because she felt she just wasn't being the kind of mom she wanted. She had always pictured herself as an involved, caring, proactive mom. However, as she tried to juggle the various aspects of her life and became busier and more overwhelmed, she realized she was just trying to get through each day. She was just surviving. She loved her kids, but other than caring for their basic needs, she didn't feel emotionally connected to them in the way that she really wanted. We worked together to help her be the kind of mom she was in her heart, but was having problems making a reality. After coaching, she felt a sense of peace about her mothering. She was clear on her priorities, and learned to manage her busy schedule in a way that worked for her as well as for her children. She ended coaching being the kind of mom she'd always wanted to be.